Hello my friends!

I had something happen to me this week that changed what I wanted to write about in this newsletter. I'd like to tell you about it and thinking with you over some of the thoughts it spurred in my mind as I have continued to ask this question, "in our world today, what does it look like to love our enemies like Jesus taught us to do?"

Before we get into that, here are some resources I have found helpful on this topic.

RESOURCES TO CONSIDER

-One of the books that has deeply impacted me on this topic is Valarie Kaur's "See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love." She not only talks about her encounters with Christians in our country, both negative and positive, but she tells her own story and her own people's story in this country as she elaborates the importance of "seeing no stranger." It is incredibly powerful. She narrates the audiobook herself. I would recommend you listening to it if you are able as you can hear her heart and pronunciation of words in her language all the more clearly.

-Another powerful book on this topic I recently finished is Marshall Rosenberg's, "Nonviolent Communication: Create Your Life, Your Relationships, and Your World in Harmony with Your Values." Dr. Rosenberg has devoted his entire life to this work of nonviolent communication. He has worked to bring peace between waring tribes and factions throughout the world and he even tells about how he speaks to those who voice antisemitism against him as a Jewish person. He tells many powerful stories in this book and he helps us to think about ways to incorporate this language of life into our own relationships. He also narrates the audio book himself.

-I randomly listened to an episode of a podcast I had never listened to before. The podcast is called "You're Wrong About" and the episode was called "Changing Your Mind." They just featured normal, ordinary people calling in and telling about a time they had their "mind changed" about something. I found myself deeply moved as I listened to it. Not only was it so cathartic to actually hear about people changing their minds in a world where it feels like that never happens, it also really inspired me to see how so many of the people found more compassion and love after they had their mind changed. Thought I'd share that with you if you'd like to listen as well.

Okay, on to today's content.

Loving Your Enemy In A Divided World

I was asked to speak at a small conference this weekend here in Idaho on the topic of "political extremism."

I will often set up to work and write at my local Whole Foods Market once a week. As I was sitting there preparing for this conference, I overheard a conversation between two older white men seated behind.

They were talking rather loudly about how liberals are actively trying to stop and even kill conservative Christians.

One of them said, “Jesus said to turn the other cheek, so if a liberal insults you by calling you a racist, then just brush it off. But if those f&%$@!+ liberals try to kill us, we have every right to take them out. They’ll find out just how wrong they are about thinking that we Christians are "p&^%#$.”

They then went on to talk about their stockpile of guns and food rations for what’s about to “go down next year.”

“You and your wife will have to come stay with us when everything goes down,” one of them said. “They won’t be able to get up to the house, unless they use snowmobiles, and if they do, we will be ready for them.”

Then they talked about how to donate to Trump's campaign without using electronic donations, because electronic donations are "part of the mark of the beast that Satan is using to control our culture right now.”

“I keep emailing Trump to tell his team to do cash or some other kind of donation, because I’m not giving liberal PayPal or some other woke platform my information!” one of them said.

Welcome to the kind of conversations you will overhear at the grocery store in Idaho.

I simultaneously felt many things as I listened to these two. I felt anger. I also worried for those who were the targets of their hostility. I feared possible violence those like these two might cause. Memories of January 6th came to mind. I actually wanted to step into their conversation and see if I could offer some questions to ponder, but a sense of helplessness washed over me as I wondered how to counter such false narratives. Narratives that even co-opt Jesus and the Bible to perpetrate such anger and fear. I felt hopeless as I wondered if such minds could actually ever be changed.

Then these thoughts naturally led to me asking, "how am I supposed to love folks just like these?"

If I am being completely honest, I see people like these two men as an "enemy."

Growing up staunchly conservative myself in Idaho, yet now pastoring as an adult, it sin't the people I grew up being warned about who have mistreated me the most. It isn't atheists, Muslims, Mormons, LGBTQ people, Immigrants, or liberals who have treated me with malice and contempt. It has been people just like these two men, both inside and outside the church. I never feel as unsafe as when I hear beliefs like these said out-loud, especially when I and those I care about are the target of their anger. I am a straight, white, Christian pastor. I can't imagine how they might treat others who aren't like me who also don't fit into what they believe to be "right."

I see them as an "enemy" not because I believe I am at "war" with them. I see them as an "enemy" precisely because of how they see me and others who don't believe as they do as a "threat." A threat they believe needs to be conquered and eliminated.

The Dictionary even defines "enemy" as "a person who is actively opposed or hostile to someone."

How then am I supposed to "love my enemy?" as Jesus calls us to do?

Because these kinds of people are in my community, in my Christian circles, and in my family. I don't want to live in fear of them but I also don't want myself or those I love to be the target of their hostility. How can love help to settle both my fear but also possibly make peace?

I don't claim to know the answers about this difficult topic, but I have had experiences of seeing minds like these two men change over time. Change to be more compassionate, less fearful, and less hostile.

I experienced this first as being someone just like that for the majority of my life. Then I had my mind changed myself over time. And it wasn't because someone told me how wrong I was or how stupid I was for holding such beliefs. It was quite the opposite actually.

I had parents, professors, and friends who saw how passionate I was about what I saw as "the truth" and defending it. They acknowledged my desire to work for what I saw was "good" in the world. Then they asked thoughtful questions, respectfully. They suggested looking at my beliefs from various angles. They took me seriously enough to engage with me rather than dismiss me. They built relationships with me and journeyed with me. They really did love me well. I was changed by that love.

I think overhearing this conversation between these two men and all the others I have heard that sound just like it recently has reminded me of a trap many of us can fall into.

I think no matter what ideological "side" we find ourselves on, I think there is a tendency to define ourselves by not being the other side. Whatever "they" are, we are going to work just as hard to be the opposite. We can fall into this trap to such an extent that it becomes virtually impossible to even have a conversation with the "other side." Or at least we think it is impossible, so we don't even try.

I think in looking at our ideological "enemies" we can forget to look at how we might be just as reactionary, entrenched, and even hostile about some of our convictions as they are about theirs.

I think the beginning of "loving our enemy" begins by seeing how similar we really are to "them." Rather than just being preoccupied with our differences.

Don't get me wrong, I really do believe so much of our work as Christians politically right now needs to be centered on advocating for human rights, so much of which are being attacked and eroded.

Yet so much of that work involves seeing and valuing human dignity. I don't think that work can be accomplished fully or well if we deny and ignore human dignity in any way, even of those who oppose us.

No matter how "wrong" we think the "other side" is, are we allowing our beliefs about their "wrongness" to dehumanize them in our own hearts and minds? If so, isn't that exactly why we are now having to advocate for human rights in the first place? Because for so long, the Christian Right has demonized people within the abortion issue, immigration, LGBTQ issues, and even among the poor that all they really see is non-human enemies to be conquered rather than actual human beings in the midst of very complex situations? Wouldn't dehumanizing those who oppose us potentially lead us or the next generation to see them as a group that needs to have their rights taken away or possibly even eliminated? Isn't that exactly what those like the two men I overheard believe what's happening to them? Doesn't responding to dehumanizing beliefs just perpetuate dehumanization?

While it is incredibly difficult to do so, especially hearing so much of the hostile rhetoric like the conversation I overheard, I have to remember to not reduce their humanity to their beliefs that I disagree with. I have to remember that there is more to who they are than what I overheard in that 20 minute conversation. I have to remember that they are created in God's image too, just like I am.

I think the beginning of loving our enemies starts with seeing them as human beings worthy of love rather than enemies who need to be conquered.

I think it starts with a commitment to not repaying hostility with hostility, fear with fear, or either/or extreme thinking with either/or extreme thinking. Because when we do give into those things, we reduce people to their ideologies and no one is free to be human. To say it another way, no one is free to be wrong and still be loved. Without love, no one is free to have their minds changed for the better. We just stay locked in an ideological war.

I think loving our enemies starts with a commitment to not just seeing ourselves as private, consumeristic individuals in the landscape of ideologies, but as a nation of people, who are all in this together. A people who will only pave a way forward that benefits us all when we collectively work together.

These are the words of Jesus that have been on my mind in the midst of all this (Luke 6:27-36):

“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you."

“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."

As I read these words I remember how Jesus was talking to the poorest of the poor. People, like Israelites, who didn't enjoy political power or influence in Rome and constantly had injustice carried out against them. Jesus is giving them such practical instructions for not being taken advantage of by an unjust system. As we have seen even in our own country, how minority groups and racial groups have been treated in our history and at present, those who enjoyed privilege and power in Rome misused it against those same groups as well. Then if they dared to "slap back" after being slapped or dared to "keep their shirt" after a prominent person took their coat for the fun of it, those with privilege and power would use their influence to carry out injustice against them.

While many of us may not find ourselves in the same impoverished and powerless position as Christ's first audience, I think it still carries important weight for us today.

So often our anger towards our ideological "enemies" can distract us from the proactive and productive work of making a difference, especially for the impoverished and powerless among us.

This has really convicted me, especially about what we see on social media. If you spend anytime on social media, you can see how easy it is to be provoked to anger by something someone posts that goes against everything you stand for. Sometimes, we can get sucked into a "debate" which really isn't a good faith debate. It's just a fight. This can ultimately consume so much of our time, not to mention our mental and emotional energy.

As one who has gotten caught in that cycle before, I ask have finally been asking myself when I see posts like these, "what other productive things could I do with my time and mental energy? That last time I did this wasn't productive at all and I feel so upset and hopeless afterwards. How can I choose something productive and hopeful instead of engaging in "debates" like these?"

You see, it has been an age old tactic by those who hold positions of power and privilege to provoke those who are seeking justice and change into endless debates over the issues themselves as a way of ultimately preventing any actual work from being done towards justice and change. The poor and the powerless suffer the most when this is allowed to happen. Every single time.

After these two men left the booth behind me, I let my body calm down. I said a prayer for them and turned to work on my presentation for the conference on political extremism in hopes it will help to bring the change I want to see happen in our world.

I think loving our enemies includes not allowing them to steal our hope and productivity away from what we are striving for. I think it means turning the other cheek when they make their hostile comments and posts, then pray for them as we turn and put our energy towards the actual work of nonviolent, proactive change for the common good of all people, including them.

It includes not supporting leaders and politicians who dislike the same people we dislike, but focuses on actual positive change. It includes not striving to be "anti-them" but striving to be more like Jesus. It includes addressing issues in ways that is more compassionate and nuanced and isn't just about dismissing "them."

Responding to "us vs them" mentality with an "us vs them" mentality only perpetuates the cycle of brokenness. Responding with instead with the mercy, compassion, prayer, and keeping the bigger picture in mind by "treating them the way you would want to be treated," as Jesus taught us, is truly the way I believe we can break the "us vs them" cycle. Reminding us all that there is only one humanity. We really are all in this together and we wont get anywhere unless we work together.

Jesus, help us to love our enemies.

Now I'd like to hear from you.

When was the last time you had your mind changed about something? What was it? Does that help you to think about how others might also have their minds changed too? Have you found helpful ways of "loving your enemies?" I'd like to hear about those if you care to share.

If you do not have a church home right now and you are looking for a place to worship, even if it's just online, you are always welcome at Cathedral of the Rockies. I serve as the pastor at our Amity Campus.

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I truly appreciate you all,

Ben

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